The Strange Tranquility Only Found In The Lonesome

An immigrant spends Thanksgiving in the countryside

Thanksgiving is the holiday that poses the ultimate challenge to an immigrant who doesn’t have any next of kin in the US. Imagine you are all by yourself on the eve of the Lunar New Year in China. You can surely go buy those firecrackers and light them up on your own, getting all excited by the sound of the explosion and the sparks. But you probably won’t jump around it or applaud or laugh. There are things you only do naturally when families are around. Kids next door are taking selfies with their grandparents a couple of feet away. If your eyes contact, you’ll smile and say “Gei Nin Bai Nian!”, meaning “Wish you a Happy Lunar New Year!” You probably say the phrase multiple times to all your neighbors in order to show enough volume of kindness and excitement. Then you go home.

It doesn’t necessarily make things easier if you have a partner or a great friend who is born and raised in the US. Again, imagine being invited to your boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s parents’ house, not as a one-time special arrangement so that people around the table will say “this year we are so glad that we have a special guest…” No, you are there every year. You are eventually making yourself one component of their family tradition, assuming you are blessed with a sweet and stable relationship. Even so…